{"id":7357,"date":"2022-05-03T13:39:20","date_gmt":"2022-05-03T20:39:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/?p=7357"},"modified":"2022-05-03T13:40:53","modified_gmt":"2022-05-03T20:40:53","slug":"clubius-incarnate-part-35-street-lights-april-1960","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/2022\/05\/03\/clubius-incarnate-part-35-street-lights-april-1960\/","title":{"rendered":"Clubius Incarnate Part 35 – Streetlights (April 1960)"},"content":{"rendered":"

Dad said he\u2019d \u201cwatch\u201d David so mom and I could go over to a \u201cmeeting\u201d at Paul\u2019s house. As mom and I walked down the street between our house and the park I was thinking that I wasn\u2019t sure what a \u201cmeeting\u201d was, even though I had heard the word a lot. There are some things I wouldn\u2019t ask mom because I was worried that if I did, she would want to ask me why I was asking that question, and I wouldn\u2019t want to tell her. But this wasn\u2019t one of those things.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s a \u2018meeting\u2019?\u201d I asked her.<\/p>\n

\u201cMmm\u201d, she said nodding, \u201cThat\u2019s an important word to know. A meeting is when some people get together to figure something out and decide what to do.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy\u2019s it important?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n

She chuckled and said, \u201cBecause that\u2019s the way we human beings figure out what to do when the thing we need to decide affects more than just one of us.\u201d Then she pointed at the park across the street. \u201cLike whether to take that piece of land and spend the money to turn it into Almendinger Park.\u201d<\/p>\n

That was interesting, because I and other kids had \u201cmeetings\u201d all the time, though we didn\u2019t call them that.<\/p>\n

We got to Paul\u2019s house and mom pushed the buzzer that let them know someone wanted to come in. Paul\u2019s mom opened the door.<\/p>\n

\u201cI was just wondering where you two were\u201d, she said, \u201cI just called your hubby to see where you were and he said you were headed over.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSorry we\u2019re late\u201d, mom said.<\/p>\n

\u201cNot a problem\u201d, she said, \u201cC\u2019mon in. Everyone else who\u2019s coming is here. Coop\u2019s a regular here but Jane this is your first time, right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYes it is\u201d, mom said, looking around. \u201cI just LOVE your house. All the big glass doors looking out into the back.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThanks Jane\u201d, she said, \u201cIt\u2019s great when it\u2019s nice out like today. But it\u2019s a pain in the tush on a cold day in the winter, believe me. I\u2019m not sure what Dillie was thinking when he redid this area of the house. I have to wear an overcoat to make breakfast in the winter!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDill\u2019s your husband?\u201d, mom asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, Randall,\u201d she said, \u201cSometimes he feels like my oldest child, If you know what I mean.\u201d She waved her hand at mom. \u201cWell I could bend your ear. Men, right? But everyone else is out on the back patio so come on out. Can I pour you two a glass of lemonade? Help yourself to potato chips!\u201d<\/p>\n

I nodded. Mom said, \u201cThat would be nice, thank you.\u201d Then she looked at me. \u201cWhat do you say when someone does something nice for you?\u201d<\/p>\n

I never said thankyou to another kid, but I guess you were supposed to with grownups, especially if they weren\u2019t your mom or dad. Otherwise they might think you were a bad kid. I looked at Paul\u2019s mom and I said, \u201cThank you.\u201d Mom patted me on the shoulder.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re very welcome, both of you\u201d, Paul\u2019s mom said.<\/p>\n

Next to the kitchen stuff were two doors that were all windows and opened up. Outside them was that \u201cpatio\u201d thing with bricks in the ground to walk on and a really big round picnic table. I had never seen a round picnic table before, and this one was REALLY big.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere they are!\u201d said Molly\u2019s mom. Molly was there too, but sitting on the other side of the table with the other kids, Paul, Kenny, Marybeth and Hannah. Next to Molly\u2019s mom was Kenny\u2019s mom. Paul and Kenny were sitting with Molly between them and there was space to sit between Kenny and Hannah. I usually sat next to Molly but I figured I should probably sit in that space because I was the last one. Mom sat next to Paul\u2019s mom, who poured us each a glass of lemonade and set it in front of us. It was interesting because the kids were on one side of the big round table and the grownups were on the other side.<\/p>\n

Still standing, Paul\u2019s mom looked at mom and said, \u201cWell Jane, I think we\u2019re all here now, though Marybeth and Hannah\u2019s grandmother couldn\u2019t make it.<\/p>\n

Marybeth nodded and said, \u201cHer leg was hurting, but she said she was \u2018here in spirit\u2019, and that I can speak for her.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIs she okay?\u201d Molly\u2019s mom asked, \u201cI enjoyed meeting her briefly the other day after Cooper\u2019s birthday party, though I felt bad waking her up.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBabcia\u2019s old\u201d, said Hannah, looking at Marybeth.<\/p>\n

Marybeth nodded and looked at her sister and said, \u201cBabcias are always old. That\u2019s why they\u2019re babcias.\u201d Then she looked at Molly\u2019s mom and said, \u201cShe\u2019s okay. She says her leg hurts sometimes, but she still does stuff if she has to or really wants to.\u201d<\/p>\n

Molly\u2019s mom nodded and said, \u201cGot it. But please tell her we missed her!\u201d Marybeth nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom clapping her hands together and looking at mom, \u201cWe all introduced ourselves already. You know everyone here I think.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI do\u201d, mom said nodding, then looked at Kenny\u2019s mom, \u201cMissus Novak, it\u2019s been a while. I\u2019m so glad you could join us.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI\u2019m grateful to be included, Missus Zale\u201d, she said nodding.<\/p>\n

\u201cPlease\u201d, mom said, \u201cI would be more comfortable if you call me Jane. And may I call you \u2018Joyce\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course\u201d, she said, nodding, and looking less worried than she did before.<\/p>\n

\u201cAnd Marybeth and Hannah\u201d, mom said, looking at them, \u201cI\u2019ve only recently had the pleasure of meeting you two, and I\u2019m looking forward to getting to know you better. And do send my best to your grandmother.\u201d Marybeth pushed her lips together and nodded.<\/p>\n

So then mom held out her hands to Paul\u2019s and Molly\u2019s mom and said, \u201cSo Matilda, Joan, do either of you want to share what we\u2019ve been chatting about?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJane\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom, \u201cYou\u2019re the woman with the words. Why don\u2019t you go ahead.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cHear, hear\u201d, said Molly\u2019s mom. I\u2019d heard grownups say that before, but I wasn\u2019t sure if that was like right here instead of there or you should hear this.<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay\u201d, said mom, nodding and closing her eyes to think what to say, then opening them up again and looking around at everyone at the table including the kids.<\/p>\n

\u201cSome of you may have seen me sitting out in the middle of Almendinger Park\u201d, she said, looking at different people at the table as she kept talking, \u201cJust sitting, reading a book, sketching, or writing lists of chores to get done. I do that so Coop can play with his friends in the park but still have someone keeping an eye on him. I\u2019ve got his younger brother David to look after too, so I bring him with me, and when he was younger, he\u2019d just kind of wander around near me, or explore the lilac bushes or sit and watch the kids play baseball over on one of the baseball fields. But now he\u2019s nearly two and he wants to go find his big brother or play with all his toys at home like Coop did at that age. I need to spend the time with him like I did with Coop, so sitting in the park isn\u2019t really an option for me anymore.\u201d She looked up at the sky doing more thinking, then continued.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo I read in magazines about parenting\u201d, she said, \u201cAnd Joan keeps me up to date on all the latest academic thinking.\u201d Molly\u2019s mom smiled and nodded. \u201cThey generally talk about three styles of parenting. \u2018Authoritarian\u2019, where the parent lays down the law on every subject and the kid is under strict supervision at all times and follows the rules or is punished. Then there\u2019s \u2018Authoritative\u2019, where the parent is more flexible but still sets the rules and supervises and directs the kid. The third is called \u2018Permissive\u2019, and is generally thought of as spoiling the kid and letting them do whatever the hell they want.\u201d Kenny\u2019s mom made a funny noise and mom shook her head.<\/p>\n

\u201cForgive me for using that word\u201d, mom said, \u201cIt was just my passion getting the better of me!\u201d Kenny\u2019s mom closed her eyes and nodded.<\/p>\n

Mom looked around again at everyone else at the table including us kids. \u201cWell the approach that Coop\u2019s dad and I follow doesn\u2019t really fit in any of those categories\u201d, she said, \u201cI would call it \u2018Independence\u2019 parenting. You watch and listen to the kid, and to the best of your ability and budget, you give them the things that they need to explore and figure out the world on their own. You make as few rules as possible, and give them as much independence as possible. Our world is changing every day now. We are now training seven men as actual \u2018astronauts\u2019 to go up in space. By the time our kids are adults our world may be a very different place.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cSo I feel strongly\u201d, she said, then looking at Kenny\u2019s mom, grinning and rolling her eyes, \u201cstrongly enough to swear, that kids need to be comfortable from the youngest possible age being independent and charting their own course.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell said Jane\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom, but looking like she was really thinking, \u201cWhat if you see your kid about to make a big mistake and just a little good advice would save him or her from the pain, embarrassment or frustration?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah\u201d, said mom, closing her eyes and nodding, then opening them again and looking at Paul\u2019s mom, \u201cThat\u2019s always the hard question. As a parent you want to keep your kids safe, protect them from harm.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYou\u2019re a negligent parent if you don\u2019t!\u201d said Kenny\u2019s mom, looking worried and even a little mad.<\/p>\n

Mom closed her eyes and nodded again. \u201cI agree Joyce, but hear me out, and to respond to your question too Matilda. Give the kid your advice but don\u2019t demand they make the choice you advise unless they are really endangering themselves. Looking back at my own life, I had the freedom, the independence, to make a lot of mistakes. But oh boy did I learn my lessons, and in the process, I moved beyond any fear of making even bigger choices and maybe bigger mistakes in the future, and not living life to its fullest.\u201d<\/p>\n

Then she looked at Kenny\u2019s mom again. \u201cI agree with you that all us parents have a critical responsibility to keep our kids safe and help them grow up. But have we truly kept them safe if as grownups they haven\u2019t learned to fully chart their own course, in a world that is likely to be very different from ours, where some of the old rules we taught them may no longer apply?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell, I didn\u2019t intend to get on a soapbox here\u201d, mom said, \u201cI just wanted you all to know that Eric and I have decided that now that Coop\u2019s five, we are going to let him play in the park by himself, and unless we have some special plan, he can make the decision when to come home as long as at the end of the day, he comes home when it starts to get dark and the streetlights come on.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mom looked at everybody again and said, \u201cI just want all of you, adults AND kids, to know that, if you see Coop unsupervised in the park, that\u2019s not something to be concerned about. Of course if you see him in some sort of trouble or danger, I would hope you would assist, just like I would assist you or your kids.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay\u201d, she said, holding up both her hands, \u201cI\u2019ve said my piece, and more than I intended. I\u2019d like to hear everyone\u2019s thoughts.\u201d She smiled and opened her eyes really wide for a second.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell I\u2019ll start\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom, raising her hand, \u201cAs always Jane, well said! You\u2019ve got my vote if you ever want to run against \u2018the boys\u2019 for public office!\u201d Mom nodded and smiled with her lips but not her teeth.<\/p>\n

Paul\u2019s mom continued, \u201cWell of course you and I have been talking about this, and I imagine you and Joan too. The same thing you\u2019re thinking for Coop I\u2019ve been thinking for Paul too. I\u2019ve got way too much on my plate to sit on a towel or a picnic table in the park keeping an eye on Paul. But he needs to be out with his friends and I really don\u2019t have the time to arrange for his friends to come over or him to go to their houses.\u201d<\/p>\n

She took a quick look at Kenny\u2019s mom, grinned and said, \u201cHeck, the park\u2019s full of unsupervised kids.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u201d, said Kenny\u2019 mom, \u201cThere\u2019s park staff there during the summer.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cTrue\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom, \u201cThough when they\u2019re there, they\u2019re mostly around the shelter handing out sports equipment and managing the baseball diamonds.\u201d<\/p>\n

And then she looked at Molly\u2019s mom and said, \u201cAnd Joan, I know you\u2019ve got some extra considerations with Molly\u2026\u201d, she stopped talking and looked worried to say the rest of what she was thinking to say. Molly\u2019s mom nodded her head but didn\u2019t say anything. I couldn\u2019t figure out what she didn\u2019t want to say.<\/p>\n

\u201cBecause she\u2019s a girl?\u201d asked Marybeth. All the adults looked kind of surprised when she said that.<\/p>\n

\u201cYes Marybeth\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said, but looking a little bit mad that Marybeth said that, \u201cBecause she\u2019s a girl.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI can do anything boys can do!\u201d Molly said, also sounding a little bit mad. Her mom puffed her cheeks and blew air out of her mouth.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah but older boys can do bad things to girls that they don\u2019t do to other boys\u201d, Marybeth said, \u201cThat\u2019s what my grandma said.\u201d<\/p>\n

Her sister looked at her and said, \u201cShe\u2019s my grandma too.\u201d Marybeth looked at her sister and nodded but didn\u2019t say anything.<\/p>\n

\u201cLike what?\u201d Molly asked, still sounding mad.<\/p>\n

\u201cMolly. Marybeth\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said, \u201cMolly and I need to discuss this on our own later if you don\u2019t mind. An important discussion but not what Jane intended for this whole group.\u201d<\/p>\n

Mom blew air out of her mouth. \u201cLife is never simple\u201d, she said.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy sister and I go to the park all the time by ourselves\u201d, Marybeth said, \u201cAnd we\u2019re okay. Kids in the park look after each other, mostly.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell that\u2019s good to know\u201d, said mom, \u201cSo you haven\u2019t had any problems there?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNah\u201d, said Marybeth, wrinkling her nose and shaking her head. I could tell she liked being the older kid telling things to the grownups like they didn\u2019t know everything and weren\u2019t in charge of her. I wanted to be like that. \u201cMy grandma just worries a lot\u201d, she said.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s my grandma too!\u201d said Hannah. Her older sister looked at her again and nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cIf Coob or Paul goes to the park to play, I want to go too\u201d, said Molly.<\/p>\n

\u201cI get that Molly\u201d, her mom said, \u201cAnd if you\u2019re playing in the park with a friend then I\u2019m okay with that. I don\u2019t have time to supervise, particularly now.\u201d All the other grownups nodded and didn\u2019t say anything, like the rest of it was secret, but I figured it was about Molly\u2019s mom and dad.<\/p>\n

\u201cMolly and Kenny could go together too\u201d, said Kenny\u2019s mom.<\/p>\n

\u201cMOM?\u201d said Kenny, looking worried and kind of mad.<\/p>\n

His mom pointed a finger at him and said, \u201cManners young man!\u201d Kenny made a funny noise like air was coming out of his mouth then closed his eyes and his mouth and wrapped his arms around his chest.<\/p>\n

\u201cSince I\u2019m older\u201d, said Marybeth, looking like she liked being older, \u201cI can keep an eye on Molly, Coop and Paul when I\u2019m in the park. I already have to look after my sister.\u201d<\/p>\n

Hannah pushed her mouth together, looked at her sister and asked, \u201cWhen do I get to be older?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNever\u201d, said Paul, like it was important someone give her an answer, \u201cThat\u2019s just the way it works! I have an older sister too, and an older brother.\u201d<\/p>\n

I heard a noise like a car was getting close and then it stopped.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom, laughing through her nose, \u201cSpeak of the devil or devils!\u201d<\/p>\n

Kenny\u2019s mom made a clicking noise with her mouth.<\/p>\n

Paul\u2019s mom held her hands up in the air. \u201cSorry Joyce\u201d, she said, \u201cThe rest of the brood is home.\u201d<\/p>\n

Paul\u2019s brother Jake came out in the backyard and saw Paul and us other kids. \u201cWhat\u2019s going on?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n

Paul\u2019s sister was behind her brother. \u201cHey mom\u201d, she said, \u201cYou having a meeting? With kids too?\u201d<\/p>\n

Paul\u2019s mom waved at both of them. \u201cWhy don\u2019t you two come out\u201d, she said, \u201cYou might have something to contribute.\u201d<\/p>\n

Paul\u2019s dad looked out through the open door from the kitchen, looking kind of worried. \u201cYou girls having your meeting?\u201d he asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cThere\u2019re some boys here too Dillie\u201d, she said. \u201cDillie\u201d seemed like a strange nickname for a dad, I thought. \u201cC\u2019mon out and say hello\u201d, she said.<\/p>\n

He walked out onto the patio. \u201cHello ladies\u201d, he said waving his hand, \u201cAnd kids too.\u201d He looked worried like he didn\u2019t want to be there. \u201cI got some stuff\u2026\u201d, he said, pointing back towards the house.<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah, yeah, yeah\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom, laughing through her nose and waving him away, \u201cToo much cooties for you. Go! Do whatever you have to do.\u201d Paul\u2019s dad nodded and quickly went back in the house. I had never heard a grownup talk about \u201ccooties\u201d before. Then she looked at Paul\u2019s brother and sister.<\/p>\n

\u201cDoes everybody know Paul\u2019s older brother Jake and sister Lynn?\u201d she asked. I had seen them both when I had played at Paul\u2019s house, though I didn\u2019t know his sister\u2019s name. The two of them looked shy and waved to all of us, looking mostly at us kids rather than the grown ups.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s up mom?\u201d asked his sister. She was tall, almost like a grown up woman.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou two think it\u2019s okay for your brother, Coop, Molly and Kenny to play in Almendinger Park by themselves without a grown up watching them?\u201d their mom asked.<\/p>\n

Paul\u2019s sister lifted up her shoulders and said, \u201cSure\u201d, then let them go down again. His brother nodded and said, \u201cYeah\u201d.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey probably shouldn\u2019t go out there at night\u201d, his sister said.<\/p>\n

\u201cOh?\u201d asked Paul\u2019s mom, \u201cWhat goes on in the park at night?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNothing!\u201d she said, sounding a little bit mad, \u201cJust saying.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay\u201d, said Paul\u2019s mom, \u201cThanks. You two are dismissed.\u201d It seemed strange the way she talked to them, like she was being silly with them. Mom and dad didn\u2019t talk to me that way. Grown ups weren\u2019t usually silly unless they were drinking that \u201cpunch\u201d stuff at parties, but Paul\u2019s mom seemed to like being silly a lot.<\/p>\n

We sat and drank lemonade and ate potato chips for a while and finally the grown ups said it was time to go home. I looked at the other kids at the table. I really wanted to talk to all of them about what we\u2019d talked about, without the grown ups around. I looked at the other kids and it seemed like they felt the same way. I figured we kids should go over to the park together. Mom had said I could now go over to the park whenever I wanted to as long as I came home when the street lights came on. So I got brave and I asked her.<\/p>\n

\u201cMom, can I go to the park for a while?\u201d I asked, loud, so all the other kids could hear me.<\/p>\n

\u201cSure Cloob\u201d, she said, laughing through her nose, \u201cThat\u2019s what we just discussed and agreed to, so sure. Just come home when the street lights come on.\u201d<\/p>\n

I nodded and said, \u201cI will.\u201d I looked at all the other kids so they\u2019d figure out my plan without having to say what it was because I didn\u2019t want the grown ups to know.<\/p>\n

Paul figured it out. \u201cI\u2019m going to go too mom, okay?\u201d he asked. His mom nodded and looked at mom and said, \u201cOh boy Jane, so it begins, what have we wrought?\u201d<\/p>\n

Then Molly figured it out. \u201cMe too mom\u201d, she said.<\/p>\n

\u201cWell okay I guess\u201d, her mom said, \u201cJust stay with Coop and Paul and come home when they do.\u201d Molly nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019ll tag along\u201d, said Marybeth, \u201cI\u2019m older so I can look after things.\u201d Mom, Molly\u2019s mom and Paul\u2019s mom all looked at each other, smiled, and shook their heads, not at us but at each other.<\/p>\n

\u201cMe too\u201d, said Kenny, but not sounding sure about it, looking over toward his mom, who blew air out of her mouth.<\/p>\n

\u201cI guess it\u2019s okay\u201d, Kenny\u2019s mom said, \u201cAt least for right now, as long as you stay with the others and come home right after. And then young man, you and I need to have a very important talk!\u201d Kenny didn\u2019t seem happy but he nodded.<\/p>\n

So as mom, Molly\u2019s mom and Kenny\u2019s mom walked back to our street together from Paul\u2019s house, all us kids went across the street to the park, all of us looking both ways for cars since we knew our moms were watching us. The big bunch of lilac bushes that were across the street from Paul\u2019s house did not have any kids playing in them so we all decided to go in there and have our own \u201cmeeting\u201d. The bushes had lots of leaves and flowers because it was spring again and they smelled really good, like all the plants were alive again and ready to grow. And once we were in there it felt like people couldn\u2019t see us from the outside, though the sun came in the top part so it wasn\u2019t super dark in there.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo who\u2019s in charge of this meeting?\u201d Marybeth asked. She seemed like SHE wanted to be in charge because she was older.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhy does anybody need to be in charge?\u201d Paul asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo everyone doesn\u2019t talk at the same time and takes their turn\u201d, said Marybeth, \u201cAt school you have to raise your hand and be called on before you talk.\u201d All the rest of us looked at her like that was pretty strange.<\/p>\n

\u201cAt my play school we don\u2019t have to raise our hands before we talk\u201d, I said, \u201cWe just talk when we want to.\u201d<\/p>\n

Marybeth looked up and shook her head. \u201cThat\u2019s because that\u2019s not a REAL school. It\u2019s just for playing, not working like a real school.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo one was in charge of that meeting with the grownups\u201d, Molly said, \u201cAnd people just talked and didn\u2019t have to raise their hands.\u201d I could tell Marybeth was thinking about that and didn\u2019t have an answer.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s the difference between playing and working?\u201d I asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cWorking\u2019s things you have to do\u201d, said Marybeth, \u201cLike go to school, go shopping, go to a job, do chores. Maybe you don\u2019t like it but you do it anyway to make money or because you\u2019re told to.\u201d<\/p>\n

Marybeth looked a little bit mad, shaking her head. \u201cI don\u2019t know. You guys do what you want. All talk at the same time and don\u2019t take turns!\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe\u2019re talking now and we\u2019re taking turns\u201d, said Paul, \u201cI think it\u2019s just when grownups are around kids they want to be in charge of them so they make the kids do extra stuff.\u201d Marybeth looked at him kind of mad and Paul saw that.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t know\u201d, he said, \u201cThat\u2019s just what I think. At MY nursery school the grownups sometimes make us raise our hands.\u201d Then thinking for a minute. \u201cLet\u2019s just be regular and talk but not at the same time.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay\u201d, said Marybeth, not mad anymore. Molly, Kenny, Hannah and I nodded. We all sat there for a while without talking, liking being together and hidden inside the lilac bushes and being able to smell them too. The smell made you feel kind of crazy and full of energy, like you could do anything and wanted to.<\/p>\n

\u201cI can ride my bike without training wheels\u201d, Molly said, \u201cI \u2018practiced\u2019 with my dad and then he took them off and I could do it.\u201d Then she looked at me and said, \u201cCoob still has his on.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cI know\u201d, I said. I wasn\u2019t really mad, but I felt like I really really needed to figure that out so I could be like a big kid. As long as I had the training wheels the kids with the regular bicycles would think I was still a little kid.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen my brother gets his new bike then his old bike will be mine\u201d, Paul said, \u201cThat\u2019s how it works when you have an older brother. They get all the new stuff.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s not fair\u201d, Hannah said. Paul nodded but didn\u2019t say anything.<\/p>\n

\u201cI don\u2019t even have a bike\u201d, said Marybeth, \u201cI don\u2019t really need one. I\u2019ve got to watch my sister so I just do walking.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo you even have a mom and dad?\u201d Paul asked her.<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course I do\u201d, Marybeth said, looking kind of mad, \u201cHow would I get born if I didn\u2019t have a mom and dad.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cMe too\u201d, said Hannah, \u201cHow would I get born too.\u201d Marybeth nodded, but then shook her head.<\/p>\n

\u201cOur mom and dad go places for their work\u201d, Marybeth said, \u201cThey do shows in the circus.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWhat\u2019s a \u2018circus\u2019?\u201d I asked. I had heard the word before but I couldn\u2019t remember about it.<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s a thing that you watch with big animals and people who do special stuff\u201d, Paul said.<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s right\u201d, said Marybeth, \u201cMy mom and dad do stuff with horses.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNeat\u201d, said Paul. The rest of us thought that was pretty neat too.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo our grandma is kind of a mom AND a dad when they\u2019re not here\u201d, said Marybeth.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe\u2019s a Babcias\u201d, said Hannah. Her sister nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cI have a \u2018Nona\u2019 and \u2018Nono\u2019 and also a \u2018Geema\u2019 and \u2018Geepa\u2019\u201d, said Kenny.<\/p>\n

\u201cThey get special names \u2018cuz they\u2019re so old\u201d, said Marybeth. I was thinking I had a grandmother and grandfather but they didn\u2019t have special names. Maybe they weren\u2019t old enough, though they seemed pretty old.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo should we be a club?\u201d, asked Paul. I looked at Kenny and Molly and we all nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cI should probably be in charge\u201d, Marybeth said, \u201cCuz I\u2019m older.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWell maybe\u201d, said Paul, \u201cBut you can\u2019t make us raise our hands to talk or be like an army general or Captain Nemo.\u201d Marybeth nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe should probably vote\u201d, I said, remembering those other boys in the park who always said there should be a vote, though they only wanted the vote to be for what they wanted.<\/p>\n

\u201cOkay then raise your hands\u201d, said Marybeth, looking around at everybody else. Molly, Kenny and I put our hands up right away. Paul didn\u2019t, but saw that all three of us had, so he figured he\u2019d do it too. Hannah didn\u2019t put her hand up.<\/p>\n

Marybeth looked at her and said, \u201cYou\u2019re supposed to vote for me cuz I\u2019m your sister.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cDo I have to?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n

\u201cShe doesn\u2019t have to\u201d, said Paul, \u201cOr it isn\u2019t really a regular vote.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cBut I\u2019m still in charge\u201d, said Marybeth, \u201cBecause everybody else voted for me, right?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah\u201d, said Paul nodding, \u201cI think that\u2019s how it works.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cWe should let other people join our club\u201d, said Molly, \u201cIf we want them to. But no grownups.\u201d Everybody nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cBut it also should be secret\u201d, said Kenny, \u201cWe can\u2019t tell anybody there are girls in the club.\u201d Paul and I nodded our heads, but Molly and Marybeth looked at us like they were getting ready to be mad.<\/p>\n

Kenny looked worried and said, \u201cIf boys know there are girls in the club AND that a girl is in charge they\u2019ll tell other boys and they\u2019ll say we\u2019ve got cooties and we\u2019re sissies.\u201d Kenny looked at Molly and Marybeth. \u201cYou do not want to be a sissy! That\u2019s worse than being dead!\u201d<\/p>\n

Marybeth looked at Kenny like she didn\u2019t think he was right.<\/p>\n

Kenny looked at her very worried and said, \u201cEverybody said that Brad kid was a sissy because he played with girls and even liked dolls. Now he doesn\u2019t come to the park anymore.\u201d That sounded really bad.<\/p>\n

\u201cSo some boys don\u2019t like girls too\u201d, said Marybeth, \u201cI just don\u2019t play with them.\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cYeah\u201d, said Kenny, \u201cBut being a boy and a sissy is way worse than being a girl. You get to be a boy but they say you still want to be a girl. That\u2019s way way worse!\u201d.<\/p>\n

Then we all stopped talking. I don\u2019t think any of us wanted to talk about it any more, it just made everybody worried or mad. Instead we talked about what the name of our club should be and when we should have the next meeting. We talked about what the name should be for a long time and we had a vote and decided to call our club the \u201cCorner Club\u201d because the lilac bushes we were hiding in were right by the corner where all the streets came together that went to all our houses. Molly\u2019s idea was the \u201cBest Club\u201d, and I voted for it too, but the others voted for \u201cCorner Club\u201d. We also talked a long time about when we should meet next. We decided that our next meeting would be \u201cin a week\u201d, which was the next time it was the same day, which was Saturday. We were all just happy to be with each other. Kenny was really happy because I guess he thought that none of us really liked him before.<\/p>\n

Then the thing mom had been talking about at the first meeting happened. Paul looked up through the top of the bushes and said, \u201cThe streetlight is on.\u201d I looked out toward where my house was and the streetlight there was also on.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou guys have to go home\u201d, Marybeth said.<\/p>\n

\u201cYou have to go home too\u201d, said Kenny to Marybeth.<\/p>\n

Marybeth shook her head and said, \u201cWe don\u2019t HAVE TO, but we will.\u201d<\/p>\n

Paul looked both ways and crossed the corner over towards his house by himself. Marybeth and Hannah walked across the street and towards their grandma\u2019s house.<\/p>\n

Kenny, Molly and I walked across the other street then toward our houses. We got to my house first, with their houses across the street.<\/p>\n

Molly looked at me and said, \u201cTomorrow you should practice on your bike so you don\u2019t need training wheels anymore. Then we can go riding like big kids together.\u201d I nodded.<\/p>\n

\u201cMy dad said I can get a bicycle too\u201d, Kenny said, then looking worried, \u201cBut I don\u2019t know when\u201d. Molly and I nodded.<\/p>\n

I looked at Kenny and said, shaking my head, \u201cYou don\u2019t have to tell your mom and dad about our club.\u201d<\/p>\n

Kenny looked worried, but finally nodded his head and said, \u201cYeah okay, I guess so.\u201d Then he looked even more worried and asked, \u201cBut what if my mom asks me what we were doing?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJust say we were playing in the lilac bushes\u201d, Molly said. Kenny looked at her, still kind of worried, and nodded. They both walked across the street back to their houses.<\/p>\n

That night mom read David and I stories because dad was busy working in his office down in the basement on his \u201cdissertation\u201d, that thing he had been working on for a long time. She started reading a new book called \u201cA Child\u2019s History of the World\u201d. She sat in the rocking chair and read us the first chapter called \u201cHow Things Started\u201d.<\/p>\n

It was about a really long time ago before there were any people, or animals, or plants. Before there was even the Earth that we live on. There were just stars. She read\u2026<\/p>\n

One of these stars is our sun. Yes, our sun. The other stars would look the same as the sun if we could get as close to them. But at that time, so long, long ago, our sun was not just a big, round, white hot ball as we see it in the sky today. It was then more like the fireworks you may have seen on the Fourth of July. It was whirling and sputtering and throwing off sparks.<\/p>\n

One of these sparks which the sun threw far off got cool just as a spark from the crackling log in the fireplace gets cool. And this cooled-off spark was\u2026 what do you suppose? See if you can guess.<\/p>\n

It was our world! Yes, the world on which we now live.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Then she read about how our world was just a cooled off spark that was a giant ball of rock with steam all around it. The steam turned to rain and made giant \u201cpuddles\u201d that were our \u201coceans\u201d. And then the \u201cliving things\u201d appeared. Tiny plants grew in the oceans that were too small to even see. Then tiny animals, \u201cmites\u201d, that you could barely see.<\/p>\n

\u201cOf course\u201d, mom said, \u201cThere were no people yet to even try to see them.\u201d<\/p>\n

Then came things like insects. Some lived in the water, some on the water, some even on land. Then came fish in the water and frogs that lived in both the water and the land. She read\u2026<\/p>\n

Then, after this, came Snakes and huge Lizards bigger than alligators, more like dragons; and they grew so big that at last they could not move and died because they could not get enough food to eat.<\/p>\n

Then, after this, came Birds that lay eggs and those Animals like foxes and elephants and cows that nurse their babies when they are born.<\/p>\n

Then, after this, came Monkeys.<\/p>\n

Then, last of all, came–what do you suppose? Yes–People–men, women, and children.<\/p>\n

Here are the steps; see if you can take them:<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

\u201cOkay\u201d, said mom, looking at me and David too, smiling a little bit, but like she was going to tell us something special and secret, \u201cHere are the steps. Remember, one thing leads to another. That\u2019s how things work.\u201d<\/p>\n

She tilted her head to the left and put up her left hand and said, \u201cStar\u201d, with her voice going up. Then she tilted her head to the right and put up her right hand and said, \u201cSun\u201d, with her voice going down. And like that she read through all the steps\u2026<\/p>\n

Star, Sun
\nSun, Spark
\nSpark, World
\nWorld, Steam
\nSteam, Rain
\nRain, Oceans
\nOceans, Plants
\nPlants, Mites
\nMites, Insects
\nInsects, Fish
\nFish, Frogs
\nFrogs, Snakes
\nSnakes, Birds
\nBirds, Animals
\nAnimals, Monkeys
\nMonkeys, People<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Finally she read\u2026<\/p>\n

And here we are! What do you suppose will be next?<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

She opened her eyes really big and looked at David and then at me. I couldn\u2019t figure out if she had read that question from the book or she had asked it herself. I did that thing where you push your lips together and raise your shoulders to say you don\u2019t know, without having to say words. But then I thought if we are going to take over from these crazy grownups we had to figure out what was next.<\/p>\n

Mom said goodnight to the two of us, kissed David\u2019s head, wiggled his nose, found my big toe under my covers to wiggle it, then left the room. I could hear her walk through the kitchen and then step down a couple of the basement stairs.<\/p>\n

I could hear her voice. \u201cEric. How\u2019s it going?\u201d I couldn\u2019t hear if dad said something but mom stopped talking. Then she said, \u201cI\u2019m done reading to the kids. Do you want to take a break? You don\u2019t have to sing to them EVERY night.\u201d<\/p>\n

Again I couldn\u2019t hear if dad was saying anything. \u201cOkay\u201d, I heard mom say, \u201cI\u2019m shot. I\u2019m going to curl up in bed with a book but probably will be asleep shortly. Don\u2019t work too late!\u201d I heard her walk through the kitchen and the living room and into their bedroom. I heard the creek of their bed as she sat down on it. I heard dad coming up the basement stair and then through the kitchen and living room before he peeked in our bedroom door.<\/p>\n

He sat in the rocking chair and we sang two songs. David and I each got to choose one. David wanted the song he called \u201cMish\u201d, which was really called \u201cI want to go back to Michigan\u201d. I wanted the \u201cWhiffenpoof\u201d song, because I liked watching dad when he sang it. He seemed happy when he sang it and seemed to think about things that he liked. I didn\u2019t see him as much anymore because he was always not home or working on his \u201cdissertation\u201d.<\/p>\n

After he was done and had said goodnight to us and wiggled our toes, I thought about the world being born, just like David and I were born. That was a long long time ago, so the world was really old, but it didn\u2019t seem like it was \u201cold\u201d, like my grandmother or grandfather, or Marybeth and Hannah\u2019s \u201cBabcia\u201d. The world was different now than when it was a \u201cbaby\u201d and was just a giant rock with steam all around it. Now it had all those plants and animals and us people too. It was \u201cgrowing up\u201d too.<\/p>\n

I thought about that question mom had asked about what was next. I thought about Tom Swift. He seemed to be trying to figure out what was next. I also thought about Captain Nemo. He maybe knew what was next, at least the Professor thought so, but he was really worried about it and maybe people weren\u2019t ready yet. But I knew they were pretend people from stories, but maybe me and the other kids could be real people like them and figure out what was next.<\/p>\n

I thought about the lilac bushes, and how they smelled like secret meetings and figuring out what was next.<\/p>\n

I thought about the streetlights, that would now let us be big kids until they came on and we had to go home.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Dad said he\u2019d \u201cwatch\u201d David so mom and I could go over to a \u201cmeeting\u201d at Paul\u2019s house. As mom and I walked down the street between our house and the park I was thinking that I wasn\u2019t sure what a \u201cmeeting\u201d was, even though I had heard the word a lot. There are some […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[13,1773,515,1775],"class_list":["post-7357","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-adventure","tag-ann-arbor","tag-childhood","tag-human-development","tag-memoir"],"aioseo_notices":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7357","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=7357"}],"version-history":[{"count":4,"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7357\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":7362,"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/7357\/revisions\/7362"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=7357"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=7357"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.leftyparent.com\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=7357"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}