![](\"https:\/\/images.dailykos.com\/images\/619697\/large\/Red_punch_in_bowl.jpg?1544212815\")
I heard the doorbell ring in the living room. Mom was in my bedroom with me helping me button up the special shirt she had bought for me for dressing up. She said it was a \u201cCampbell tartan\u201d because \u201cCampbell\u201d was my \u201cmiddle name\u201d.<\/p>\n
\u201cJonathan Campbell Zale\u201d, she said. \u201cThat\u2019s a name you can run for President with some day!\u201d Her eyes twinkled when she said it. We were dressing in special clothes to go to a party across the street at Molly\u2019s house. Mom was wearing a bright white shirt under a blue \u201cdress\u201d. That was one of those things that only women wore that was open at the bottom, instead of pants or shorts, which was what she wore the rest of the time. She had on the black shoes, \u201cheels\u201d she called them, that made her really tall, but also walk kind of funny. Her lips were very red and shiny.<\/p>\n
\u201cMargie\u2019s here!\u201d dad called from the living room.<\/p>\n
\u201cGreat\u201d, mom called back to him as she buttoned the sleeves of my shirt. It felt uncomfortable to have that tight feeling of shirt sleeves around my wrists. \u201cShow her where we keep David\u2019s bottles in the refrigerator and where his diapers are in the linen closet and how to work that damn diaper pail!\u201d mom said.<\/p>\n
\u201cLiz, I got it!\u201d, his voice sounded just a little bit angry, like she didn\u2019t need to tell him that because he already knew.<\/p>\n
Mom finished all my buttons and adjusted my \u201ccollar\u201d. \u201cYou look very handsome\u201d, she said.<\/p>\n
She waved me to walk out of my room and walked behind me patting me on the shoulder, which I did not like. When I came into the living room Margie was at the door from the kitchen. She was not a grownup like mom and dad but also not a kid like me. She was wearing a dark blue sweatshirt with yellow letters that I knew said \u201cMichigan\u201d because I had one like it too.<\/p>\n
\u201cHi Jonathan\u201d, she said, \u201cYou\u2019re all dressed up. You look very nice in that shirt!\u201d She was about the only person who called me that name, because mom told her to and paid her money.<\/p>\n
Mom patted me on the shoulder again. \u201cTell Margie what\u2019s special about your shirt.\u201d<\/p>\n
I really didn\u2019t like it when mom told me what to say.<\/p>\n
\u201cSo what is the deal with your shirt little man?\u201d Margie said, getting down on one knee in front of me.<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s a tartan\u201d, I mumbled. I didn\u2019t want to say it the way mom wanted me to say it.<\/p>\n
\u201cA what?\u201d, Margie asked.<\/p>\n
I heard mom blow out air and finally say, \u201cIt\u2019s a CAMPBELL tartan, Jonathan\u2019s middle name!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay\u201d, said Margie, still on one knee, smiling and looking at me. \u201cIt\u2019s your family colors!\u201d<\/p>\n
I felt embarrassed and mad that mom was talking for me.<\/p>\n
Margie gave just the littlest nod like she knew how I was feeling. Then she said, \u201cSo tonight you\u2019re all grown up going to the party with the folks while I babysit your baby brother!\u201d<\/p>\n
I nodded, not saying anything because I was still mad at mom.<\/p>\n
Mom said to Margie, \u201cLet me show you where the diapers are and how to work the pail.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLiz, I said I can do it\u201d. I could hear the anger in dad\u2019s voice. \u201cYou head over to the party with Cloob\u2026 Jonathan!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEric\u201d, mom replied, \u201cI just want to show her the trick with the pail.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cLiz\u201d, he said, \u201cI know the trick with the pail.\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom rolled her eyes. \u201cOkay then.\u201d She looked at me, \u201cJonathan, you can escort your mom to the party.\u201d<\/p>\n
I didn\u2019t want her to take my hand, so I walked to the front door and opened it for her to walk out like I\u2019d seen dad do.<\/p>\n
\u201cSuch a gentleman\u201d, Margie said as she followed dad into the hallway to find out about the diapers and the \u201cdamn\u201d diaper pail.<\/p>\n
\u201cThank you young man\u201d, mom said to me, her bright red lips smiling and her eyes twinkling as she walked out the open door. I pulled it closed so it made a clicking noise.<\/p>\n
Molly\u2019s house was all lit up and you could hear voices inside talking and laughing. I looked up in the sky and the moon was a big round circle just over the tops of the trees. The street was full of cars all dark and still, and no people in them. But their outsides sparkled in the moon\u2019s light. Though it was dark, the air was still warm and kind of wrapped around me like I was under a blanket. The door to Molly\u2019s house was already open and a man standing by the screen door opened it for us to come inside.<\/p>\n
\u201cJane Zale\u201d, he said, his eyes moving from her face to look down her entire body to her feet, \u201cYou\u2019re looking pretty damn good for a lady who\u2019s just had a baby.\u201d His words were coming out in a strange way like they were slowing down.<\/p>\n
\u201cThanks Mort\u201d, she said, putting her hand on my shoulder like she was protecting me, \u201cHow many drinks have you had?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cA few\u201d, he said, \u201cWatch out for the punch, it\u2019s wicked!\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom pressed her lips together and made them smile. \u201cThanks for the tip!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWho\u2019s your date?\u201d he said, looking serious and silly at the same time.<\/p>\n
Mom breathed in and out. \u201cMorton, meet my son Jonathan.\u201d<\/p>\n
He leaned over to look at me more closely and stuck out his right hand. I did not know what to do. He reached farther and grabbed my right hand and shook it.<\/p>\n
His eyes were kind of wobbly as he looked at me and smiled. \u201cYour dad says you\u2019re quite the little ballplayer, a lefty like Johnny Podres. Johnny Zale\u2026 It has a nice ring to it. Like Tony Zale.\u201d He looked up at mom.<\/p>\n
She wasn\u2019t smiling anymore. \u201cHis name is Jonathan, Mort. Not Johnny!\u201d she said.<\/p>\n
\u201cC\u2019mon Jane, a boy needs a nickname!\u201d he said.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat may be true Morton\u201d, mom put her hand on his shoulder and looked at him, \u201cBut his is not Johnny.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay Jane\u201d, he said chuckling, \u201cI never pick a fight with a good looking woman!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGood thing for you in my case\u201d, mom said, a big grin now on her face, her hand still on his shoulder and leaning towards him, \u201cBecause you\u2019d lose that fight!\u201d<\/p>\n
He looked up at the ceiling and laughed. Mom gave him a final pat on the shoulder and then patted me on my shoulder with her other hand and we continued to walk into the house. It was full of grownups, men and women, most of them holding and drinking from funny looking glasses filled with what looked like water but was red.<\/p>\n
Molly\u2019s mom saw us and came over.<\/p>\n
\u201cWelcome you two\u201d, she said, \u201cLook at Cloob\u2026 er Jonathan all dressed up! But where\u2019s your other guy?\u201d She was saying her words kind of funny too. Maybe that was what grownups did at parties.<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019ll be along in a minute\u201d, mom said, \u201cHow\u2019s it going?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt\u2019s going gangbusters Jane\u201d, she said, \u201cWe\u2019ve raised nearly four hundred bucks for Phil\u2019s campaign already!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cGood for you Joan\u201d, mom said, \u201cI wrote you a check for twenty. Maybe that will put you over the four hundred mark!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJane, you don\u2019t have to do that\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said, \u201cI know how tight the budget is right now.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNo Joan\u201d, mom said, \u201cThis is probably the most important twenty bucks I\u2019ll spend all year, to help put a man of Phil\u2019s character in the U.S. Senate!\u201d She pulled a piece of paper out of her purse and put it in a big pot on the table in the middle of the room with red, white and blue streamers all around it. Molly\u2019s mom thanked her and gave her a little kiss on the cheek.<\/p>\n
Mom reacted to the kiss by opening her eyes wide, saying, \u201cAnd how many drinks have you had, young lady?\u201d<\/p>\n
Molly\u2019s mom laughed, \u201cWho\u2019s counting! The more everyone drinks the bigger the numbers on the checks. And you know I can hold my liquor with the best of the boys!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI sure do\u201d, mom said, and she looked at me and opened her eyes wide.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnyway\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said to mom, \u201cI\u2019m dying to introduce you to Dick Sampson. He and I were grad students together in poly sci. He says he knows Eric and wanted to finally meet you. HE ended up getting his PhD and is now teaching.\u201d She nodded slowly as she said it and looked up at the ceiling. \u201cI ended up getting married and then Molly came along.\u201d<\/p>\n
She led mom and me over to two men talking very loud to each other in the corner of the living room.<\/p>\n
One said to the other, \u201cLook Dick, Kierkegaard said \u2018existence precedes essence\u2019, and Sartre and de Beauvoir are just starting with that axiom and taking it steps further.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI\u2019m not buying it\u201d, said the other, who winked at Molly\u2019s mom as we approached them, \u201cIt\u2019s not an axiom in my book, just an unproven theory! I\u2019m not much for existentialism, I\u2019m a Hegel dialectic man.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI don\u2019t want to stop your tete a tete here\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said, \u201cBut Dick, I wanted to introduce you to Eric\u2019s wife, Jane Zale.\u201d<\/p>\n
He looked at Molly\u2019s mom and then at mom and his eyes lit up.<\/p>\n
\u201cJane Zale\u201d, he said, \u201cSo you\u2019re the girl that finally corralled Eric\u2019s heart. We finally meet!\u201d<\/p>\n
Molly\u2019s mom tapped mom on the shoulder and said she would go find Molly, and she headed toward the stairs up to Molly\u2019s bedroom.<\/p>\n
\u201cWe finally meet, Dick\u201d, mom said, \u201cSo tell me how you know Eric.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI know him from Michigamua\u201d, he said<\/p>\n
\u201cMichigamua?\u201d mom asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cYes. Well. It\u2019s sort of a semi-secret university men\u2019s club. A bunch of guys being guys\u201d, he said. \u201cHalf naked. War paint. That sort of thing. The less said the better. Not really for mixed company.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay\u201d, mom said nodding, \u201cI get it.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cSo Jane\u201d he said pointing at her, \u201cMaybe you can help Lynn and I settle this argument once and for all. Have you read de Beauvoir?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI read The Second Sex for a soc class\u201d, mom replied.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay, perfect. I\u2019ve been dying to pose this question to the female of the species\u201d, he said, turning to look at mom, his eyes briefly glancing down from her face to her chest, \u201cDon\u2019t you agree with me that it\u2019s nuts what de Beauvoir said, that \u2018one is not born but becomes a woman\u2019?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom didn\u2019t say anything for a minute thinking. Finally she said something.<\/p>\n
\u201cI think she\u2019s being provocative Dick. Of course women are born female and men male. But honestly, I don\u2019t think it\u2019s any more natural for me to do dishes and change diapers than it would be for a man like you!\u201d<\/p>\n
He laughed. \u201cYou wouldn\u2019t want me trying to change diapers Jane, I\u2019d make a mess of it!\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom chuckled. \u201cYou underestimate yourself Dick. I could teach you in ten minutes. With a little practice you\u2019d be as good as any woman!\u201d<\/p>\n
He made a funny snort like an animal. \u201cI\u2019ll pass!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cWell there you go\u201d, she said with a big smile on her face and some fierceness in her eyes, then touching the side of his shoulder with her hand, \u201cIt\u2019s really a choice on your part. Yet it\u2019s supposed to be natural for women like me, though it\u2019s really not. I think that\u2019s what de Beauvoir is getting at.\u201d<\/p>\n
He frowned, but also liked mom touching his shoulder, so he smiled again and started nodding. \u201cOkay. I\u2019ll have to think about that one. If I hadn\u2019t had so much punch I might have a good comeback.\u201d Mom laughed.<\/p>\n
He looked down at me and said, \u201cThis your little Johnny?\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom pushed her lips together and her head moved a little from side to side. \u201cHis name is Jonathan. My brother is named John. My son is Jonathan.\u201d<\/p>\n
I felt embarrassed, like there was something wrong with me that my mom had to try to fix with her words. I never liked it when grownups talked to each other about me when I was there with them.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay Jonathan it is\u201d, he said, looking at me again. But I could tell in his eyes he didn\u2019t think so.<\/p>\n
I felt uncomfortable, and when I felt that way I usually stopped talking. But I also didn\u2019t like mom talking for me. So I told him.<\/p>\n
\u201cThey call me Cloob\u201d, I said.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat?\u201d He looked at me with wobbly eyes and a funny look on his face. Then he looked up at my mom with that same look.<\/p>\n
\u201cWell\u201d, mom said, pushing her red lips together again, \u201cThat\u2019s a nickname his dad made up, \u2018Clubius\u2019.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cClubius\u2026 Sounds kind of Roman\u201d, he said, looking up at the ceiling and thinking, \u201cSenator Maximus Clubius addresses the Forum.\u201d<\/p>\n
Mom nodded but didn\u2019t say anything. I could see in her eyes she was doing a lot of thinking instead of talking.<\/p>\n
Most of what they were talking about I couldn\u2019t figure out. But that was what grownups did. I looked around the room for Molly. I saw Molly\u2019s mom over by the front door talking to dad and pointing towards mom and me. She then went upstairs and dad came over to where we were.<\/p>\n
\u201cEric\u201d, Dick said, \u201cI\u2019ve known you for what, four years, and only tonight I finally meet your better half. She\u2019s already wounded me in a philosophical argument.\u201d<\/p>\n
Dad tried to smile, nodded and chuckled. Finally he said, \u201cGood to see you again, Dick. Congratulations on your doctorate!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cThanks Eric\u201d, he said, \u201cYou started on that dissertation yet? Cardinal Newman?\u201d<\/p>\n
Dad shook his head, losing his smile, blowing air out between his lips. Mom shook her head too. There was that \u201cdissertation\u201d word again that they were always talking about.<\/p>\n
Molly appeared from behind dad. She was wearing one of those dress things on the bottom part of her body but no socks or shoes.<\/p>\n
\u201cCoob\u201d, she said, \u201cWant to play in my room?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNow there\u2019s the best offer I\u2019ve heard all night!\u201d, Dick said and laughed. Then looking at me, \u201cYou better say yes my man or I might instead!\u201d<\/p>\n
Molly\u2019s mom appeared behind Molly and put her hands on Molly\u2019s shoulders. \u201cDick you\u2019re too much. I ought to cut you off from the punch.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh god Joan, anything but that!\u201d Then looking around. \u201cWhere\u2019s your hubby?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cHe\u2019s around somewhere\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said, \u201cMaybe down in the basement showing some of his work buddies our new television.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cOh my\u201d, he said, \u201cSo you\u2019ve succumbed to the boob tube! You of all people Joan! It\u2019s like a virus spreading! Commie plot to rot our brains!\u201d<\/p>\n
Molly looked at me and rolled her eyes. I knew she wanted me to go upstairs with her. I nodded and she ran towards the stairs and I followed.<\/p>\n
\u201cLike a moth to the flame\u201d, I heard him say as I followed Molly up the stairs to her bedroom. Even from her room we could hear the talking and laughing below.<\/p>\n
Molly said she wanted to play \u201cSky King\u201d. I helped her move the two big puffy chairs so they were right next to each other, both facing one of the windows looking out across the street. She had a plastic toy thing with buttons on it and a steering wheel to fly the plane. She also had a black plastic box, with a button and a red light on top. Then she went over to the wall and turned off the lights. She sat in the one chair, the steering wheel thing in her lap. I sat next to her in the other chair, the black plastic box with the red light between us.<\/p>\n
When the lights were on in the room it was hard to see out the window because you saw the inside of the room too, like a mirror. But when the room got dark that all changed. Our eyes were able to see what was outside the window. The shapes of houses, and cars in the street shining from the moon. Light from inside those houses coming out the windows, including our house across the street where David and Margie were.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay. Ready to take off?\u201d she asked.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay\u201d, I said. I would go anywhere with Molly and I knew she would go anywhere with me.<\/p>\n
\u201cRoger\u201d, she said, and she pushed the button on the black box and the red light started to flash. She grabbed the steering wheel and pushed other buttons. \u201cTaking off!\u201d We saw the houses and the cars below us as we flew over them. We could still hear the voices and laughing of the grownups at the party below us, but now it seemed farther away. I turned my head to look at her and every time the red light flashed, it made her face look strange and scary. Like the light was showing the inside of her rather than the outside. Seeing her in a way that wasn\u2019t the regular way. We were both quiet and continued to fly over everything together.<\/p>\n
Far away I heard the door to Molly\u2019s room open. I heard the voice of Molly\u2019s mom saying, \u201cWhat is going on in here?\u201d I returned to the room and opened my eyes and saw three faces in the flashing red light, looking down at Molly and me. They were all smiling and their eyes happy, though their faces looked strange like Molly\u2019s had.<\/p>\n
\u201cThese two\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said. She was talking slow and funny like the other people had down at the party. \u201cOur little adventurers\u201d, said dad. \u201cSo dear\u201d, said mom. Mom and dad were talking that funny way too. Molly\u2019s mom pushed the button to turn off the flashing light. Molly was still asleep.<\/p>\n
\u201cJoan, thanks again for hosting a great party\u201d, mom said, \u201cIt\u2019s been forever since Eric and I have been out together with adults.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt certainly has\u201d, dad said. Then all three of them started to laugh.<\/p>\n
\u201cI may be jealous of Dick getting his PhD\u201d, Molly\u2019s mom said, \u201cBut I wouldn\u2019t trade anything for getting to be Molly\u2019s mom!\u201d She stroked Molly\u2019s hair and Molly opened her eyes, rubbed them, and stretched her arms.<\/p>\n
\u201cThe feeling is mutual\u201d, mom said.<\/p>\n
Dad looked at me and his eyes were wobbly and he spoke very softly. \u201cYou want a ride home on my back, Cloob?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cEric dear\u201d, mom said, \u201cYou\u2019ve had a lot to drink, you better not.\u201d<\/p>\n
Somehow I knew to shake my head no.<\/p>\n
\u201cOkay. Okay. Okay\u201d, dad said, nodding. He ran his hand through his hair and took a deep breath and blew it out.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou two okay?\u201d Molly\u2019s mom asked them, \u201cI think I\u2019m going to tell Jack to put less vodka in the punch next time.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cI think we\u2019re okay Joan\u201d, mom said, \u201cWe just need to get home and let the babysitter go and put this guy to bed. It\u2019s pretty late. It was a wonderful party! Thank you so much for hosting it!\u201d<\/p>\n
As mom, dad and I walked out of her room Molly said, \u201cGood night Coob.\u201d I looked at her one last time and nodded. I didn\u2019t want to say good night to her with all the adults watching and thinking that was so nice.<\/p>\n
When we got out of Molly\u2019s front door, mom put her arm around dad\u2019s waist and pressed her body against him. \u201cMmm\u2026 you feel good\u201d, she said in a slow calm happy voice.<\/p>\n
Dad put his arm across her back and said, \u201cYou too Liz, it\u2019s been a while!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIt has\u201d, mom said, \u201cHopefully David\u2019s asleep and will stay so for at least a few hours.\u201d<\/p>\n
Their words and feelings seemed strange to me. They were not the way they usually talked to each other. Other grownups at the party had been talking that strange way. More like kids than grownups.<\/p>\n
Mom looked up at the dark sky. \u201cYou know\u201d, she said, now looking down at me with her big friendly eyes, her other arm grabbing my shoulder and pulling me against her. \u201cYou need a proper nickname until you\u2019re old enough for people to call you Jonathan. \u201cClubius\u201d is cute and we all love it, but it\u2019s more of a baby name, and I think the kids in the neighborhood are going to tease you if you don\u2019t have a more normal nickname.\u201d<\/p>\n
Her big blue eyes reflected the light from the moon. She looked both happy and sad at the same time. She didn\u2019t seem so much like a grownup, which made me want to say something.<\/p>\n
\u201cI like the \u2018Coob\u2019 name that Molly says\u201d, I said.<\/p>\n
\u201cHmmm\u201d, mom said, sounding more like a grownup now.<\/p>\n
\u201cLiz\u201d, dad said, \u201cThere\u2019s that sax player from Stan Kenton\u2019s band, Bob Cooper, that they call \u2018Coop\u2019!\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cCoop! Cooper!\u201d mom said, \u201cWhat do you think, young man?\u201d She squeezed my shoulder.<\/p>\n
I still liked Molly\u2019s name for me, but I nodded.<\/p>\n